Jackie Stout

Jacqulyn (Jackie) Stout

A lively debate could be had to decide whether Jacqulyn (Jackie) Stout was a more proud Mother or proud Grandmother. Grandmother would win out as thoughts about Fletcher and Keaton dominated most of her conversations and visits by them took priority over all other events in her last years.

Beyond her love for her two grandsons, though, was a never-ending love of family. She carried her family name of Stout like a chest full of medals, loving each and every one of us as much as the next. Every cousin and each of their children held the same rank in her heart; she spoke of her kin every day with the love of having just released them from a hug. Her Aunt Marguerite, the matriarch of the family, made a prayer shawl for Jackie and it is the first thing for which she asked each morning- to have it wrapped about her shoulders as tribute to the prayers that bolstered her spirit as she struggled with her daily maladies in the last years of her life. Each day began with a prayer she has kept alive from her Aunt Bonnie: "This is the day the Lord has made. Let us rejoice in it."

From her morning table she looked upon the canopies of the trees in her woods by the lake. Her hot coffee in a cup from her apple dishes collection in hand, she would pray for the loved ones who had departed from their place settings before her: her brother, Edward; her best friend of 60 years, Taresa; and, devastatingly, her son, Pete. It is they whom Mom sits at the table with now, free in spirit and glad in heart for being once more together.

"Mama" became her moniker to almost every person who came to her in the last two years of this life. She welcomed each with a smile no matter how poorly she felt. Her niece, Angie, her son's friends, the amazing caregivers she had in the last year all accepted her as Mama because it was Mother Love she gave: unconditional, caring, forgiving, tender, selfless, abiding. It was this Mother Love that sometimes made it hard for Jackie to let others care for her as she became more fragile; but it was the greatest and most profound gift to offer Mother Love back to she who so generously offered it.

Each soul who is now mourning Jackie's departure from this shore is realizing the irreconcilable experience of simultaneous grief and relief. Grief that we can no longer sit beside her and hold her tired hand or put a loving arm around her tiny shoulders and receive as much comfort as we are giving, Relief that she no longer struggles for breath. Grief that she will not have an earthly view of her grandsons as they grow and thrive, Relief that she no longer hurts. Grief that we do not get to hear her sweet laugh that so easily graced each conversation, Relief that, with the crossing of horizons, her mourning has transmuted into rejoicing as she is now with her Mother, Daddy, Ed, Taresa and Pete.

Until the grace of time reconciles the grief our hearts feel, we will have our feet in both worlds: the world where we could look at her sweet, wide smile and bright blue eyes and the world now, her chair empty and no coffee in the apple cup at her place setting.

Jackie Stout- Mother, Grandmother, aunt, niece, sister, cousin, friend, Christian, artist, florist, Mama, laugher, lover of mystery and Giver of Mother Love has left this world full. She is survived by: a broken-hearted son, Eric; two tall grandsons, Fletcher and Keaton; her niece, Angie; her sister, Tommie and her two children, Jenny and Jeff; and a wide swath of Stouts and Wilsons who reflect the absolute essence of goodness in each and every one of them. Jackie Stout's family made her complete, and she now fills our hearts completely.